Emotional Reck

Been on a emotional reck today. I don't know what's wrong with me today. It's like I can't control my emotions. In my head, I'm thinking to my self "What the heck is wrong with me?" I've been crying over every little thing. I don't want this to lead into emotional eating today. That's what I usually do when I get upset. I just want to eat and not exercise.

I usually get emotional before my period. I'm toward the end of it and I don't know why I'm getting this way. Want this period to end. Feels like I've been on it over a week. I heard that we lose more weight after your period from someone at a gym. Not sure if that's true. Can't wait till it's over to prove that theory right.

So tired cause I didn't get to bed on time. Stayed up with my roommate Aurora watching "Return with Honor." Which is a great movie. Love it. It was my second time watching it. Want to buy it when I get a chance.

I also been upset with my other roommate Ani. She hasn't been here lately. We are all best friends. I'm more closer to to Aurora than Ani for some reason. Now mainly cause she's been staying at another of her friends place this whole time. She comes here once a week or every other week. She doesn't really talk to us. Most she texts Aurora instead of me. In a normal just a roommate situation, that would be great that she is not at the place. The whole an absent roommate is the best roommate thing but that's not the case. Lately she's been wanting to find herself at another friends place and been leaving us in the dust. It feels like she's not as close to us anymore and has been very distant. I know she wants to back away from the church and make her own decisions. That's fine. It's just the fact that she's pulling away from us that's killing us. It hurts seeing Aurora cry and get hurt cause she's no longer wanting to hang out with us. She has been treating us like an accessory. And not like the best friend that she has been. She wasn't even here for my birthday for some petty excuse that she wasn't feeling well. If she wasn't feeling well, she should have been home getting well instead at a friends house getting her friend and her friends son sick. She also wasn't there for my friends dad's birthday who took her in. Said she wasn't feeling well that day too. And her birthday is coming up on the 26th and not sure if she's going to be here that day too. I know it's a lot of silly drama. She said she loves us but she treats us differently. She apologizes from time to time but keeps on treating us the same way.

Whew. That's a lot of venting. Sorry all for all the negative nancy stuff today. On the bright side, I've been good with my eating habits today. I've had Shakeology for breakfast and lunch. And a plum & Atkins protein bar for snack. Going to workout after work in about 20 min. Going to do "Legs & Back" & "Ab Ripper X" P90X workout today. Thinking about running today...but I'm so tired. I need to do it though. I'm also going to meet up with a friend today. Excited to see her again.

Well, that's all for now. I feel better now that I put it all out there. : )